I'm a Terrible, Terrible Wife

I have really been trying to be a good wife... I have been attentive to my husband's needs, I have been supportive of his "joblessness", I have kept a tidy house, and I have cooked healthy meals. Could he ask for anything more?! (Well, maybe a tennis partner that doesn't scream at him when she feels he hits the ball too hard... but c'mon, he nails them into the corners on purpose!) Anyway... so far, it has been pretty good.

So here's the start of the terrible tale... I came home from class at 6:30pm and started cooking. We had planned to eat the fresh chicken billy had bought the other day and I was going to make "red thai curry" using the pre-made sauce we had. Simple, simple... cook the chicken, add the sauce, cook the rice, cook the green beans.

When I opened the fresh chicken, I thought I smelled something different. I put my nose right up to it, and it didn't smell exactly as I suspected, but not that bad. Maybe chickens here eat different types of grass? I really didn't want to waste it (or run to the store to get more). It wasn't discolored, so I decided it was good to go. I cut it up, and sauteed it. I realized something didn't smell right... was it the chicken, or was it the sauce that I had opened? Well, I continued on... added the sauce and mixed it all together. Meanwhile, I was microwaving the rice because I didn't have enough space on the stove with the chicken and the green beans. So when I took out the dish of rice (covered by a plate to keep in the moisture), the plate immediately cracked into two pieces when I put it in the sink. It was an omen...

So, a little pissed off about breaking the plate, I threw everything together and told Billy it was time to eat. As we sat down, I told him that I wanted to taste the chicken before he did... so I did, and the texture was really funny. But maybe it was the way I had cut some of the pieces.. with the grain? So then I had another bite... but it was so hard to tell with the overpowering sauce. (Meanwhile I was kicking myself that I hadn't cooked it all the way through before adding the sauce.) Billy tasted it and we spent the next 5 minutes trying to figure out if it was good to eat or not. Billy decided it was... and I decided to only eat the rice.

Ridden with guilt and worried that I had just given my husband (of exactly two months) salmonella, I had to take some action.... Right after he was done eating, I made him go throw up!!! (and he did)

So, let's re-cap.... I cooked questionably foul chicken, allowed my husband to eat it while I abstained, and then forced him to induce vomiting. Will I be up for the wife-of-the-year award, or what?! But hey, he's teaching today and not at the hospital... do I get points for that?!